Hollow

So, it's a Moeker gig night, and I'm not unleashing a drunken post into cyberspace... something a bit wrong there. I think it must be a combination of a few things: the fact that they were on stage at 8.15, so there was no warm up drinking time; the fact that I'd double booked myself and had to leave straight afterwards; the fact that it's totally completely freezing outside; and the fact that, despite having had both beer and wine, neither appear to have had much of an effect on me.

Talking of the cold, does anyone know whether it's possible for headphones (or possibly (and more expensively) I-Pods) to freeze? Mine was doing seriously odd things on the way home,

I've had a truly horrible day at work dealing with some really shitty issues, and culminating in upsetting a very good friend. I was dealing with the situation to the best of my ability. Today I learnt that sometimes your best just isn't good enough.

But, I did have an excellent weekend in Scotland. Apart from the losing the rugbt and the utterley completely horrendous hangover on Sunday (which was still around yesterday) that is.

A pic, as we've not had one for a while:



And another, of the Scottish drinking gang:



Time for bed.

Words

This very cool website created this (found here - it's a pictorial representation of the words found most often in my blog entries.

Interesting.

I've exhausted my blog inspiration (probably for the rest of the month) on the previous post, so I don't have anything deep and meaningful to add today. My thoughts are dominated by something deep and painful - an ear infection. Sob.

Moments

I've been thinking today about the nature of 'moments' of memory. I think what I mean is best described as those snippets of memory which suddenly come back to you when you're in the middle of something, and they have a persuasive effect of distracting you. They happen to me in meetings, when I'm reading, and of course most often at random (and usually inconvenient) times when I'm supposed to be concentrating at work.

They come in different forms. Sometimes they make me chuckle as I remember a comedy moment (the foam ceiling springs to mind here), or they are touching. Perhaps the most distracting ones are the ones which are fixating. They are often recalling the briefest of moments - possibly the moments which I wanted to last longer, or I think I could have handled differently... or I wonder 'what would have happened next if...?'. Those times where there is perhaps just a millisecond of something, and it leaves you wondering what it means.

No point wondering 'what if' though eh. Sometimes I have to remind myself that there will be a lot more 'moments' to be created and then recalled, and they all add to the catalogue. Of course there are some which would be best forgotten, either because they are cringeworthy, embarrassing, or just really don't deserve to be recalled. And of course, these are the ones which come back to haunt me at the most inappropriate times... but I can usually block them out. It's the 'brief moment' ones which stay around... sometimes the tiniest snippets of recollection play on my mind the most. I find myself rehearsing them over and over.

Sometimes I wish I had a thought stick or a dream collector which works on day time thoughts (I'm thinking BFG by Roald Dahl here). I could just get rid of them... or find somewhere to store them until I want to reflect - or until things have changed so much that they paint a different part of the story.

Anyhow, on that note, I'm in five-hours-sleep-a-night-mode at the moment, so tis time for bed. I am trying to make the most of the few hours, and reading for a bit before I go to bed to calm my mind for some serious sleeping. Driving to work does make things much better though - and the sense of victory I feel when arriving at work at 6.59 and therefore avoiding the congestion charge is disproportionately good.

There should be pictures of the car, but as it rained for most of the weekend, there aren't any. In fact, there's been an absence of pictures of late. Must rectify that in Scotland this week - although I fear the quality won't be that high!

Oh yes

The car is all mine. And it's very cool and very fast.

And now I have more beer.

Oh yes.

Skunk

So. Today I'm not so sober. A rather nice few beers after work has much improved my mood, especially as they were with good company (although I'm never with bad company really!) in a very nice quiet setting where we had table service and were really able to chill out. It's been a hard week that's for sure, and I'm very much looking forward to having a good weekend (including getting the new car of course!)

I did have one of those 'I love living in London' moments on the way home, when I saw my building all lit up and being used for an event, which has also helped to improve my mood. And now Sliding Doors, which is a fab movie (which in my usual style I've seen loads and loads of times) is on the tv, so that helps too.

I think actually that if I redistributed my film watching I'd have watched a lot more - I've watched a few films a lot of times, rather than a lot of films. Still, it's film night at No 28 tomorrow, so that will add some new ones to my list. And they will be accompanied by pie, rice pudding and beer. Sounds like a good way to spend a Saturday night to me.

Eek

Well. The balls are still falling, but at least I haven't tripped over any yet and had a disaster. I've learnt recently that the best approach to my work is to be solution focused (which is interesting given that I have had some interesting theories on being solution focused in personal situations in the past - some of you know what I mean!) - but at the moment I just can't see the solution. It's not even as if we've identified the solution but just can't reach it - we simply can't think of it!

Anyway, I had a happy moment today when I realised (albeit slightly inappropriately in the middle of a meeting!) that it was 5pm and still light - that means the days are getting longer and summer is getting closer, which is a very good thing.

Balls

I'm dropping some. At work, that is. Usually I can just about keep them all in the air, but they are all falling down around me...

and usually I can cope ok with the stress, but today I had a weird panic attack type thingy - and had to take myself off somewhere quiet to calm down. My boss calls it mid-term-itis. Trouble is, I've only just got over the beginning of term-itis, and then it'll be the end of term-itis... but then at least it will be time for Vegas and some proper real life relaxation.

But hey, I'm ok - I always am.

Mine. Mine. Mine

It's mine. Well, at least it will be once I've collected it on Saturday, and providing that everything doesn't go completely wrong in the meantime that is!

My blogging inspiration is running low again at the moment, have hit a difficult time at work again and that's kind of absorbing me at the moment. More once I have some booze no doubt!

Maybe Cooper S...

Most of my weekend has been dominated by thinking about buying a new car... and I've much umming, ahhing, deliberating, advice taking and calculating, I have concluded that, subject to a successful chat to the dealer tomorrow, by Saturday I should be the proud owner of this:



Shiny.

P. B. 4

Moeker gig tonight. And we know what that means... oh yes indeedy, I'm drunk.

There's been a history on this blog of drunk post-Moeker gig postings, and I thought, what the hell, might as well keep up the tradition. I worked out today that I've not missed a London Moeker gig since November 2004, (the only one I've missed was the Horn in St Albans in August last year, and that was because I was in Jersey), and as I now have a signed copy of the album, I think that might just make me a dedicated follower. Oh dear. I think only Steve B has a better attendance record than me, and that's only because he made the Horn gig when I didn't.

We had great renditions of Walking in Circles, Transmission and Third, but felt slightly cheated by the lack of Unlucky AND Breaking You.

So, Moeker, next time, you're dedicated followers are putting in a plea for at least one or the other, but preferably both. Thanks muchly.

WFH

Today I've been attempting to work from home, to have a bit of peace and to get stuck in to some work without having to travel in, because the big boss is away, and because I need some quiet time.

I did pretty much stock up on that yesterday though, as I spent most of the day in bed, and didn't get out of my pj's all day! Very much enjoyed Sally's birthday do on Saturday night (of which more here and here and pictures here). A good time was had by all, and Sally particularly liked the cream. Hee hee.

Can't believe we're in February already! I also can't believe that I now have four weddings this year (April, July, August and September). Who's going to get married in May and in June so that I can have one a month all summer... eh, come on...?!